It's Been A While

A few people have written me and wondered where I have been or if I am ok. I figure that I owe my friends an explanation, since all of you are so supportive and have really been there while I have been trying to build my career.

Some of you already know I suffer from depression. Some of you don't. Well, that's been the problem for the past while. Part of the problem, actually. Some things went on that sent me into this pit that I couldn't seem to find my way out of. Much of it was brought on by my own need to be Super Julie and do everything on my own.

There comes a time when you have to sit back and take stock of your priorities. My top one at this time is getting rid of the bleak outlook and retaining what bit of sanity I have left. (A few of you are going to say, "BS Julie, I KNOW you're nuts". Heh, I won't argue. It can be fun being craz, but not when your really feel like you have lost control. Not when you wake up only to not want to move out of bed, not when you look at your children and wonder why you are yelling at them over trivial kid things.

Nope. Not good at all.

I want to go back to being the kind of nuts that finds the fun things online. That instigates a food fight with all three kids at Easter Dinner. That grabs a bucket to win a water fight that spills over into the house. The kind of nut that shares this life with everyone who wants to read about it.

So, I did what I had to do. Some of you know I resigned from blogging. It was not fair to my clients or to myself to try to continue limping along with a post a week or less. Luckily, they understood. It pays to be honest, though it does not pay to wait too long, which is what I did.

Away from writing, I have insisted that my mother move home. My husband has put his foot down about certain other things that our other 'tenants' do...or rather, do not do. In the past two days I have felt more myself than in months, so this must be working.

This is not to say that I've quit writing. Far from it. You can still find me at BellaOnline and writing my column for WAHM Magazine. In the future, you WILL find me in a national glossy. But for now, I am working on my own terms which may be a post a day or may be a post a week. Until life has stopped sending me sledgehammer whammies, that is how it needs to be.