Fresh Healthy Vending : Scam!

Dear Fresh Healthy Vending:

You are pissing me off.

Every day I visit Craigslist, much like other freelance writers. I cruise all of the cities and I find the same ad from you in almost every city. You are spamming the world and it ticks me off.

Perhaps if your company really wanted to hire writers instead of gather email addresses for spam, everything would be okay. But recruiting 'affiliates' that spread the spam even further is just horrid.

Stop preying on writers looking for real employment. Offer a real job, a real product, then maybe we'll talk.

If you are so sure that your products are great, then why not institute a blogger incentive program? Send review samples to bloggers in return for reviews. Somehow I doubt the products are that great...or else your marketing co-ordinator sucks and blows at the same time.

Writers, if you're reading this, I encourage you to flag every single ad on Craigslist you see for this joke of a job opportunity. Maybe if we all work together, we can rid CL of this type of spam...one writer, one city at a time. Flag ANY ad with fresh healthy vending in it!

My Child Wants To Be A Writer

Hold on to your panties, I'm about to get serious for a minute. (I know, right?) Sometimes even I have to step away from rants and pitiful attempts at humor. Some have said I'd be better off trying my hand at crab fishing, but I think that's because they want me to disappear at sea. Go figure.

I receive a lot of questions from people that want to break into the writing business. The questions that interest me the most come from parents. They ask, “My child wants to be a writer. How can I help him/her?”

My answer is always the same. I'll share it here.

If your child wants to be a writer, encourage them. Download a writing suite. I personally use Open Office. This suite is free and easy for novices, but powerful enough for advanced writers. Teach them to use the program or find tutorials. (I'll link to some in my sidebar eventually).

Read everything your child writes and wants to show you. Refrain from trying to correct their writing. I don't care if you are an English teacher- let them make mistakes. Making mistakes is how everyone learns. Praise the story, forget about sentence structure for now. Let them enjoy being creative.

If your child is older, you may think about writing courses. There are courses available all across the Internet. Recently I came across a tutoring/learning program for older kids. TheWritingFaculty.com offers programs in fiction, novel writing, and screenwriting. The staff is populated by magazine writers and college professors.

The major thing with parents that talk to me about their kids writing is they wonder if writing is a phase. If it is, well, isn't that better than drinking and drugs? (my friends will chime in about lush writers, I bet). I wanted to be a writer ever since grammar school. During my late teen years, I forgot about writing, it seemed like a pipe dream.

Today I write fiction, non-fiction, ghostwrite, and own a small indie digital press. Not bad for what was once a 'phase'.

Encourage your child to read. Encourage them to write. You may be the proud parent of the next King or Rowling!

Fun With NEC's Stats #2

Ack!

No, I've never used AnaNoItch.
I'm Julie Fletcher, not Julia Fletcher.
I only wish I was the novelist or illustrator. Even the real estate agent gig would be okay. Nope, I'm just a mom and writer.
Yes, I have Skype: fletcherfamily6
No, I won't buy your drugs, I don't care if they're cheaper or will increase my *ahem* size. I have no need for that, nor does Mr. Fletcher. (trust me on that one)
Yes, I play WoW. Hit me up on Wyrmrest Accord (Arlia, Undead 'lock)
I have never seen the 2 girls 1 cup video. Please stop looking for that here. You scare me.
Yes, I will consider advertising, but I won't advertise something gross/nasty/illegal.
My contact info is on the sidebar.
Yes, I review products. (but not ananoitch)

Anything else you want to know?

Easter Bunny Proof and Good Friday Giveaway!

A lot of you know I love playing with graphics. Heck, there are some of you reading this that have paid me for a business card design, a logo, or full-on picture restoration.

I've decided to do something fun. If you want to really surprise your kids this year, let me create 'proof' that the Easter Bunny visited your home! I can put him in your living room, yard, anywhere you'd like! Just send me a high resolution photo and where you want Mr. Bunny to be 'caught' in the act.

Similar services will cost you $9.95 ...I'm offering the same service, with personal attention, for HALF that.

Something you won't find with the other guys...I can put the Easter Bunny in OLD black and white photos, too. Show your kids that the Bunny was caught during your childhood, too!

$5 per photo.
All photos are delivered via email. I create, you print.
Large family? Buy 2, get 1 free!( Need even more? Special rates for 5+ orders: writingallnight AT gmail DOT com)
Send high resolution photo to the email address above with any notes/instructions.

Options

1 Bunny Proof $5.00 Buy 2 Get 1 Free $10.00 Vintage Bunny Proof $5.00

To make this even more fun, share this post.Whoever gets the most people to say "____ sent me here" in the comments here by TONIGHT 9 PM EST (4/22)will get not 1, but 2 Easter Bunny Proof's.  The commenter MUST include your name/Google account name. Winner announce tomorrow morning and will receive their photos tomorrow evening!

Dear AnaNoItch-D People,

It seems that I am the #1 result when someone searches for your product. Instead of hiring spammers to spread the word about your product, why not buy advertising space here? Thanks to the two lines showing in the Google result for me, everyone already thinks I used the product.

And for those of you just visiting- I do not use nor have I ever used AnaNoItch. For crying out loud...it was a post making fun of someone selling their itchy bottom cream on CraigsList.

So, makers of this product, send me a 125x125 banner that links to your site. We'll talk rates.

Talk soon,
J

SexIs, New Ezine from Edenfantasys

As a freelance writer I have had the pleasure of writing for many different outlets. Quite a few of you are familiar with the gigs I have had writing copy for adult related sites and that my digital press releases erotica. I was intrigued when I found that Edenfantasys has an online magazine - SexIs.

I absolutely love The Blogess. She's not some super model- though beautiful in a real way we can all relate to. She's human. She's not air-brushed, The Bloggess is in your face REAL. I want to be as comfortable in my pictures as she seems to be in hers. Comfortable in my skin and feeling sexy about who I am, not what traditional media wants women to think we need to be.

Does that make sense? I hope so.

I just found SexIs and I am hooked already. Almost all of you that visit have written something with sex in it- for money- at least once. If you have, then you'll understand why I love this column: Secrets of a Sex Writer. You might write sex, but does that mean you are perfect in relationships? Maybe, maybe not.

Were you aware that one of our own from AW writes at the Eden Cafe? That's right, Emily Veinglory, one of the most respected and knowledgeable forum members on Absolute Write can be found over there. I was very pleased when she listed BLB on Eden Cafe- it made my day. I check out her posts often. If you are an erotica writer or even thinking about trying your hand, you will never go wrong by reading her advice.

Oh, if you're worried that SexIs will be filled with things that are NSFW (not safe for work), you're right. But not as bad as you might expect when you read 'adult novelty store'. The columns are tasteful and I didn't see hundreds of B.O.B.'s there. (The store is another story, but come on, what else are you looking for there? Smoothies? Snickers?)

I'm going to check out SexIs more and let you know if they take freelance material. Check back soon for links to submission guidelines if they do!